/hyde/tests/sites/test_tagger/content/blog/angry-post.html

  1---
  2title: An Angry Post
  3description: >
  4    Temper. Temper. Temper.
  5created: !!timestamp '2011-01-01 10:00:00'
  6tags:
  7    - angry
  8    - thoughts
  9---
 10
 11{% mark excerpt -%}
 12
 13To complete the character-study of Mr. Worple, he was a man of extremely
 14uncertain temper, and his general tendency was to think that Corky was a poor
 15chump and that whatever step he took in any direction on his own account, was
 16just another proof of his innate idiocy. I should imagine Jeeves feels very
 17much the same about me.
 18
 19{%- endmark %}
 20
 21So when Corky trickled into my apartment one afternoon, shooing a girl in
 22front of him, and said, "Bertie, I want you to meet my fiancĂŠe, Miss Singer,"
 23the aspect of the matter which hit me first was precisely the one which he had
 24come to consult me about. The very first words I spoke were, "Corky, how about
 25your uncle?"
 26
 27The poor chap gave one of those mirthless laughs. He was looking anxious and
 28worried, like a man who has done the murder all right but can't think what the
 29deuce to do with the body.
 30
 31"We're so scared, Mr. Wooster," said the girl. "We were hoping that you might
 32suggest a way of breaking it to him."
 33
 34Muriel Singer was one of those very quiet, appealing girls who have a way of
 35looking at you with their big eyes as if they thought you were the greatest
 36thing on earth and wondered that you hadn't got on to it yet yourself. She sat
 37there in a sort of shrinking way, looking at me as if she were saying to
 38herself, "Oh, I do hope this great strong man isn't going to hurt me." She
 39gave a fellow a protective kind of feeling, made him want to stroke her hand
 40and say, "There, there, little one!" or words to that effect. She made me feel
 41that there was nothing I wouldn't do for her. She was rather like one of those
 42innocent-tasting American drinks which creep imperceptibly into your system so
 43that, before you know what you're doing, you're starting out to reform the
 44world by force if necessary and pausing on your way to tell the large man in
 45the corner that, if he looks at you like that, you will knock his head off.
 46What I mean is, she made me feel alert and dashing, like a jolly old
 47knight-errant or something of that kind. I felt that I was with her in this
 48thing to the limit.
 49
 50"I don't see why your uncle shouldn't be most awfully bucked," I said to
 51Corky. "He will think Miss Singer the ideal wife for you."
 52
 53Corky declined to cheer up.
 54
 55"You don't know him. Even if he did like Muriel he wouldn't admit it. That's
 56the sort of pig-headed guy he is. It would be a matter of principle with him
 57to kick. All he would consider would be that I had gone and taken an important
 58step without asking his advice, and he would raise Cain automatically. He's
 59always done it."
 60
 61I strained the old bean to meet this emergency.
 62
 63"You want to work it so that he makes Miss Singer's acquaintance without
 64knowing that you know her. Then you come along"
 65
 66"But how can I work it that way?"
 67
 68I saw his point. That was the catch.
 69
 70"There's only one thing to do," I said.
 71
 72"What's that?"
 73
 74"Leave it to Jeeves."
 75
 76And I rang the bell.
 77
 78"Sir?" said Jeeves, kind of manifesting himself. One of the rummy things about
 79Jeeves is that, unless you watch like a hawk, you very seldom see him come
 80into a room. He's like one of those weird chappies in India who dissolve
 81themselves into thin air and nip through space in a sort of disembodied way
 82and assemble the parts again just where they want them. I've got a cousin
 83who's what they call a Theosophist, and he says he's often nearly worked the
 84thing himself, but couldn't quite bring it off, probably owing to having fed
 85in his boyhood on the flesh of animals slain in anger and pie.
 86
 87The moment I saw the man standing there, registering respectful attention, a
 88weight seemed to roll off my mind. I felt like a lost child who spots his
 89father in the offing. There was something about him that gave me confidence.
 90
 91Jeeves is a tallish man, with one of those dark, shrewd faces. His eye gleams
 92with the light of pure intelligence.
 93
 94"Jeeves, we want your advice."
 95
 96"Very good, sir."
 97
 98I boiled down Corky's painful case into a few well-chosen words.
 99
100"So you see what it amount to, Jeeves. We want you to suggest some way by
101which Mr. Worple can make Miss Singer's acquaintance without getting on to the
102fact that Mr. Corcoran already knows her. Understand?"
103
104"Perfectly, sir."
105
106"Well, try to think of something."
107
108"I have thought of something already, sir."
109
110"You have!"
111
112"The scheme I would suggest cannot fail of success, but it has what may seem
113to you a drawback, sir, in that it requires a certain financial outlay."
114
115"He means," I translated to Corky, "that he has got a pippin of an idea, but
116it's going to cost a bit."
117
118Naturally the poor chap's face dropped, for this seemed to dish the whole
119thing. But I was still under the influence of the girl's melting gaze, and I
120saw that this was where I started in as a knight-errant.
121
122"You can count on me for all that sort of thing, Corky," I said. "Only too
123glad. Carry on, Jeeves."
124
125"I would suggest, sir, that Mr. Corcoran take advantage of Mr. Worple's
126attachment to ornithology."
127
128"How on earth did you know that he was fond of birds?"
129
130
131[My Man Jeeves by PG Wodehouse][MMJ]
132
133[MMJ]: http://www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/8164/pg8164.html